Oh how I hate MMC, how I hate MTAS, how I hate being a doctor right now and how I hate being me.
I probably have 6 months left of being a doctor, after all, who on earth is going to shortlist me? And even if they do I now have to wait even longer to find out because of the fecking eejits. Of these 6 months I have spending half of this time in anaesthetics, a worthy cause but not the speciality I love. That is Emergency Medicine (of which I know anaesthetics is a part but hey...) and I only get to spend 3 months there.
I admit, I haven't tried hard enough as a medic. I never strived to sit memberships exams for the various colleges out there, I was always perfectly happy being a Senior SHO, or even just an SHO. I didn't become a doctor for the letters after my name and the experience of being a college member. I became a medic to do what I am doing now, helping people, making people better, easing their pain and suffering and enhancing my diagnostic skills.
Unfortunately this counts for jack-shit with MMC. Letters after the name is what they're looking for. Career minded medics is what they want. People dedicated to the furtherance of the NHS, not their patients.
Well fuck that, they got me and I may not be any of those things but I know that when I am on good form I am a damn good and empathetic doctor and that is what I care about, not being what MMC wants me to be.
So I may be unemployed in August and yes, I'll act all non-chalent and pretend I don't care. But between you, me and the gatepost... it's going to hit me fucking hard and I don't know how I'll cope. After all the stress of university didn't agree with me very well so fuck knows how I'll take being unemployed and not having the qualifications or life skills to do anything else.
But no one will care anyway because the government will have filled it's quota of junior doctors with the people they wanted and no one will give a toss about those left out to rot with the rubbish.
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5 comments:
My goodness. I really feel so bad for all you guys. I really don't want you to think I've just done a cut-and-paste job from Hospital Phoenix and SHP's blogs, but I will say it again. I really feel awful for you guys having to go through all this. I sincerely wish you all the very best, MJ. We need more doctors like you, people who actually care about their patients and not, as you said, letters after the name.
Cal MBBS, MRCP, FRCS, MRCOG... just joking!!!
i think you must be a better person than me...with the advent of mtas and all that rubbish i really lost all hope of being a good doctor as that would mean i have to enjoy what i do- in current climes, i highly doubt that will ever happen!
I really wish you all the very best with the job applications. I am sure we need more drs like you and not less. I am a staff grade - and it is difficult being in the middle of the MMC and MTAS. All the very best. Michelle
You are not alone MJ,
There are loads of us patient oriented doctors who have been sidelined by the system
If the country has decided it wants career oriented doctors [academic doctors] rather than patient care oriented doctors, so be it.
In the past medicine was a career that required hard work and absolute dedication.
Now with junior doctors hours and the minipats and crap like that, Medicine is totally different.
It is now just a job, like any other job
Sad really
Interesting thoughts.
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